Top 5 Perks of Having Your Music Stolen by AI

#5: Instant Stardom (for Someone Else’s Algorithm)
Your song didn’t make the Billboard charts?
Good news: it just became Track #7 on “Chill Vibes for Cats Who Vape” , now streaming on 9 million smart toasters!


#4: Save Time on Branding
Why waste energy picking a cool band name when AI can rename your entire catalog “Mellow Acoustic #3498” faster than you can say “help”?


#3: Finally Get That Global Reach You Dreamed About
Your heartfelt love song?
Now sampled, warped, and re-released in Kazakhstan as background music for a TikTok ad selling reversible pants.
Dreams DO come true.


#2: Creative Freedom to… Watch AI Make It “Better”
You thought your melody was pretty good?
Well, the machine added 800 hi-hat hits, five random Portuguese verses, and a “sick drop” because algorithms understand art better than you.


#1: You Become Part of Something Bigger: The Giant, Flavorless Content Smoothie of Humanity
Who needs “individual expression” when you can dissolve your soul into a gigantic beige blob of AI soup?
Congrats!
You’re now Music Ingredient #128,002.

(Warning: May contain traces of inspiration.)


🎵 Save music. Save creators. Save humanity’s playlist.
🎵 Read the full IPWatchdog article here »

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